12 Most Annoying Things About Dating a Gamer

12 Most Annoying Things About Dating a Gamer

I should have known when he told me, “x-box isn’t just a way to stream movies and play DVD’s. It’s a portal to another world” A voice inside me screamed RUN! But I didn’t listen. Here’s a list of the problems with dating a gamer:

1. For my birthday I got a fifty dollar gift certificate to GameStop…(Which I used later to buy HIS birthday gift).

gamestop gift card

2. He refers to his penis as “Hunter Drone.”

hunter drone

3. He can’t remember our anniversary, but he knows every code for GTA by heart.

gta codes

4. I have never met his best friends face to face…and neither has he.

has never met his friends

5. His arch enemy is an eleven year old boy named Billy, aka, “Lord_Pimp_Slaughter69”

11 year old enemy

6. He has to ask permission from his Squad Leader to join me for dinner.

squad leader

7. While playing, he screams things like, “I just fucked yo ass UP, dumb bitch!” so loudly our neighbors leave domestic abuse fliers on our door step.

domestic violence pamphlet

8. He didn’t return my calls for two weeks and I started to worry…until I realized a new Call of Duty came out.

call of duty came out

9. I asked if we could do role play, and he put in “World of Warcraft”

warcraft role play

10. He respects Buddhists only because they believe in “spawning”


11. His biggest fear is the “red ring of death.”

red ring of death

12. During sex he tells me I’m going to get “PWNED.”

PWNED stamp