12 Plans Satan Has For Sandusky

12 Plans Satan Has For Sandusky

Jerry Sandusky learned his fate when a judge ordered him to serve 30 to 60 years behind bars – a likely life sentence. But according to Satan, it’s the afterlife he should be most worried about.

1. Force him to have sex with women his own age.

sandusky in hell 1

2. Provide weekly pedicures for Hitler.

sandusky in hell 2

3. Must sit next to Saddam at every Thanksgiving.

sandusky at thanksgiving with saddam

4. Must share a room with Joe Paterno.

joe paterno sandusky in hell

5. Provide daily beard groomings for Osama.

osama and sandusky in hell

6. Absolutely no showers. Ever.

sandusky shower

7. Must watch the new Mathhew Perry sitcom at least five times each day.

sandusky forced to watch matthew perry show in hell

8. Will not be included on rare Snow Cone Day.

snow cone day in hell

9. Must attend “poker night” with corrupt Catholic Priests.

preist with hot prod for sanduscky

10. Forbidden from taking part in any water sports on the lake of fire.

lake of fire water sports

11. Must figure out how to stop Linkedin from sending emails.

linkedin logo

12. Provided with health insurance, but absolutely no dental.

sandusky health insurance in hell

 

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