We’ve all skimmed through a SkyMall or browsed through a Brookstone with the thought, “Who in the hell would buy this crap?” But here’s a list of ridiculous inventions that even you didn’t know you wanted to buy.
1. Killer Whale Submarine
– Most would be wowed by the mere purchase of a personal submarine. But imagine how much cooler you’d look breaching the choppy waters under the guise of a Killer Whale? Now you can finally hit on Shamu without looking weird. Just be sure to avoid harpooners and the Japanese.
2. WineRack Breast Enhancer
-Just like a Camelbak hydrates hikers, WineRack Breast Enhancer does the very same – only instead of water on your back, its wine in your boobs. Sure, the more wasted you get, the smaller the titties, but you’ll be admired for sipping Chardonnay through a literal “Boob Tube” like a real classy broad.
3. Aquarium Coffee Table
– Love the thrill of going to aquariums, but feel the protective glass could use more coffee cup stains? Well, dream no more my aquatic caffeine drinkers. This brilliant innovation allows you to not only view rare undersea animals, but to rest your filthy feet on top of them.