Everyone knows it’s kick ass to be… ‘MURICAN
The countless freedoms we enjoy on a daily basis make it kick ass to be a citizen of this great nation. We’ve got hot women, big cars and even BIGGER food portions! It truly is extremely kick ass to be patriotic and we Americans know it. We don’t listen or take orders from anybody! If we want extra cheesy fries with our salad- we get it! If we want to raise our trucks so high we need a series of ladders to even reach the door handle – we do it! If we want to tell everyone how f**king great it is to be ‘Murican – we Git-R-Done!
So pause that ‘Honey Boo Boo’ episode, put down your Big Gulp and enjoy this collection of everything that makes this great country of ours, well…great!
1. We’ll throw a spoiler on anything.
2. We see hair as a perfect place to show our fanhood.
3. If we ain’t shootin’, we eatin’.
4. We have cellulite on our forearms.
5. We super-size our matrimony.
6. We NEVER waste bacon.
7. Patriotic mustache rides are part of our rich history.
8. Our leaders force you to “deal with it.”
9. Like I said, we NEVER waste bacon.
10. We don’t let obesity stop us from living life!
11. We ride high to soccer practice!
12. We turn thongs into fanny packs.
13. We use SMART cars the smartest way.
14. We knows how’s to talk good and whatnot.
15. We care about global warming.